You know that feeling of meeting someone new and everything being roses and rainbows? Like you’re in your favourite love song, life couldn’t get any happier and the BOOM! You’re out of the illusion. A niggling feeling lingers every day but you’re not sure what it is. Well, it could be that you’re with the wrong person. The Sun spoke to relationship experts to find out signs and here’s what you have to look out for.
Not having arguments in a relationship is one of the most significant red flags. No one likes to fight with their partners, or even argue, but is it really healthy? Two people who want to live together should be able to have a healthy and respectful discussion despite having different opinions. While never bickering with each other is a dream, it’s also a sign of walking on eggshells around one another. Or constantly hiding what you truly feel to avoid conflict. These issues ultimately result in dying sex life, passion and your spark for each other.
Yes to sex, but not with them
Sex is not the only part of a relationship, but it’s one of the most essential parts of it. Not being in the mood for sex or having mismatched libidos is normal, however, not wanting to have sex with your partner is definitely not. It’s time to reignite the spark in your relationship or go for a couple’s therapy if you do fantasise about having sex but it’s just not with your partner. Even constantly thinking about pleasuring yourself while you've a partner is amiss.
Are you best friends?
As much as romantic movies have glorified that your partner should be your best friend, it’s truthfully not the case. If they are your only best friend, it’s ultimately going to make you miserable. You need to have more friends or confidants than just your partner to maintain the relationship. Becoming too reliant on one person for all your emotional needs is toxic, to say the least.
I love you, but why?
Seems rather cliché or stupid but knowing why your partner loves you is essential. Yes, love is a feeling and you’ve no control over it, but honestly, everyone knows why they love a person. It could be the way they smile, the way they make you feel or just their entire personality, but something always tops the chart. If you don’t know why you love your partner or vice-versa, it could be because your relationship is one of convenience or mutual benefits. And it’s no surprise as, as we mature, most of our relationships become more transactional than love-based.