Good sex typically prioritises both partners' pleasure. But what if you feel too pressured to perform? While anxiety surrounding getting an erection, maintaining an erection, or not orgasming too quickly (or not quickly enough) might feel overwhelming and isolating, these are actually common issues and concerns faced by many penis-owners.
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We take a look at the top 2 and how to feel more confident in bed:
1. Performance Anxiety
The most common of all the sexual worries that penis owners have is impotence anxiety. Unfortunately, it is usually this fear alone that contributes to not being able to sustain an erection, which often creates a vicious cycle where the anxiety about the erection creates an inability to get one, which leads to even more anxiety!
The best way to end this cycle is to learn to be more present and mindful during any sexual activity. Try an extended foreplay session where penetrative sex is not the goal. This takes the pressure off, and gives you a chance to simply relax and enjoy the experience without over-thinking, thus increasing your likelihood of achieving and sustaining an erection.
2. Premature Ejaculation
Another common issue faced by penis owners is premature ejaculation. The exact cause of premature ejaculation is not known and it is usually categorised as a psychosomatic symptom. Performance anxiety and premature ejaculation are often experienced together, but according to the Cleveland Clinic, premature ejaculation can also be due to a number of other factors, including:
- Stress
- Temporary depression
- History of sexual repression
- Low self-confidence
- Lack of communication or unresolved conflict with partner
Fortunately, premature ejaculation is a learned response, so it can normally be treated without medication. Discuss your concerns with a doctor or sexuality counsellor, who can advise a treatment plan based on re-conditioning this response through behavioural techniques like the 'squeeze technique' or the 'stop-start technique'.
Sources used:
Cleveland Clinic: 'Sexual Dysfunction in Males'
Swirlster: 'Most Common Sex Issues Couples Have And How To Solve Them'
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