Are you aiming of cutting out all of the toxic people in your life for 2022? If you are, there are some ways to do it that make sure mental health isn’t badly affected by the aftermath of cutting those people off. Toxic relationships can be found everywhere, in friendships, family as well as romantic relationships. It is important for your mental health to put a stop to them if they are hurting you, no matter who they are.
1/ Forgive without asking
An important part of moving on from anything is accepting what happened without asking why. If the toxic person in your life hurt you, there is no point in asking them why they did it. The thing is, they won’t see that what they did was wrong and is normal for them. Forgiving the person doesn’t mean you’re allowing them in your life. Forgiving them sets you free of them, it helps you let go of that anger, hatred and resentment you feel towards that person. Forgiveness is the first step to healing.
2/ Refocus on your healthy relationships
Giving so much energy and expectations to a toxic relationship can be exhausting and cutting ties after all the effort may seem daunting, but it is definitely worth it in the end. Once you cut out those toxic relationships, don’t forget about those healthy ones surrounding you. They can give you the support you need as you come to terms with the end of those relationships. Toxic relationships often make us forget about those who support and love us the most as they take up so much of our emotions and energy. Even if you haven’t seen or talked to some of them in a while, they will welcome you back with open arms and a shoulder to cry on.
3/ Always be civil, brief and grateful
Even if the person you are cutting off is toxic, that doesn’t mean you cannot cherish the good moments spent together. Setting boundaries with a toxic person is a great way to keep a certain detachment from them. If you act in an abusive manner towards them, they can then claim you were the toxic one in the relationship. Nothing good ever comes from confrontation with someone toxic. It is always better to stay civil towards and keep things brief so they can’t change what you’ve said. Also, don’t forget to be grateful for their time in your life, even if they ended up being toxic, it is still a lesson to be learned and nothing can change the good times spent with them.
4/ Cut off at your own speed
You are in control when cutting off someone toxic. You can choose to go cold turkey, or you can do it slowly. Either way, it is best to analyse the situation and adapt. Some toxic relationships can turn violent if handled badly. If that is the case, cold turkey is best, as long as you have somewhere safe to go afterwards. If the situation isn’t severe, you can gradually lessen contact with the person, until it seems like you’ve drifted away.
5/ Learn to be self-sufficient
Humans are naturally interdependent, but it is also important to be independent. Learning to be self-sufficient emotionally, physically and psychologically can really help improve your life. The problem of being dependent on others, which isn’t a major issue, is that people come and go from your life. If the person you are dependent on suddenly leaves, you are left feeling miserable as you then can’t function. Being independent gives you a freedom you’ve never had before, what once used to be conditional contentment has become unconditional.