Everyone in a relationship, will at some point have to deal with the delicate balances of thesex drive.
Whether your sex drive is too low or too high for your partner, this mismatch in libido can often create issues in relationships, causing the pair of you to slowly drift apart, adding tension. For some,mismatched sex drives can even be a bit of a dealbreaker.
For others, mismatched sex drives don’t necessarily mean one person wants sex more than the other but that they prefer to get down and dirty at entirely different times of the day. For many, this trope will no doubt spring to mind the age of tale that men prefer sex in the morning while women’s spicy hours leaned towards later in the evening.
But is this disparity in sex drive true?
According to a 2,000 people strong survey conducted by IllicitEncounters, men and women really do prefer to have sex at different times of the day.
Women prefer to have sex at around 10pm
According to IllicitEncounter’s survey, men do actually tend to be early sexual risers, with 31% of men choosing to get their romps out of the way before breakfast. Meanwhile, for 34% of women, the ideal time to have sex is around 10pm.
Jessica Leoni, sex expert at IllicitEncounters, explained: ‘This new research shows that there are big differences in sex o’clock between the sexes. Men are ready for sex before breakfast, whereas women most want passion last thing at night.’
This creates big problems for some couples who get out of the habit of having sex regularly and drift apart.
But before you write off your relationship due to different sexual-time preferences, a further look into the survey shows that men and women’s ideal times for sex aren’t that far off.
Results showed that for men, morning sex only won out by a small margin, with 25% actually preferring sex in the hours of 9pm to 12am. Women’s second choice of ‘business hours’ were between 6pm to 9pm (21%), which also happened to be men’s third most popular choice, being picked by 18% of male survey respondents.
It seems that men and women’s top three choices are essentially the same, with the morning hours between 6am to 9am coming in third most popular for women (12%).
When it comes to the rest of the day, the survey results for men and women were almost identical. The hours of 12am to 2pm came in fourth for both genders, and 2am to 6am were the least favoured hours for sex, with only 3% of men and women favouring sex in the wee hours.
Men's most favoured hours for sex:
- 6am-9am (31%)
- 9pm-12am (25%)
- 6pm-9pm (18%)
- 12am-2am (8%)
- 9am-1pm (7%)
- 1pm-4pm (5%)
- 4pm-6pm (3%)
- 2am-6am (3%)
Women's most favoured hours for sex:
- 9pm-12pm (34%)
- 6pm-9pm (21%)
- 6am-9am (12%)
- 12am-2am (9%)
- 9am-1pm (9%)
- 1pm-4pm (8%)
- 4pm-6pm (4%)
- 2am-6am (3%)
What should you do if you and your partner don’t have the same sex drive?
Despite preferring sex at similar times in the day, disparities in sex drives are still a common speedbump in many relationships. Libidos aren’t set in stone, and depending on things like your schedule, health and state of mind, your desire for regular sex may wax and wane over time.
However, according to the study, differences in libido have caused 64% of women and 38% of men to engage in sex even when they aren’t feeling up for it - that’s not exactly great.
If you and your partner are suffering from mismatched sex drives, talk it out. Sit down with your partner and figure out whether or not libido is the problem or whether the difference in urges is a symptom of a bigger issue. Think about the physical and mental aspects of your life that could be hindering your desire, and maybe consider scheduling sex or experimenting with different kinds of sexual intimacy.